I’m Sorry!: Times Past Challenge

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I’m starting this post with an apology for suddenly disappearing without warning that Times Past was going on holiday for a couple of months. I know some of you wondered/worried what had happened to me and I’m sorry that I did that. My disappearance was simply that I had to take time out. Suddenly, unexpectedly my world suddenly became too much for me and some things had to go in the short term.

Saying sorry made me wonder about Times Past. Did we feel guilty easier then, or in different generations or locations. Have our values or morals changed or do we experience guilt, wrong doing in just the way we always have done. Today I am asking you to think back to the time that you remember as being the first time you felt sorry, guilty or some other emotion where you wanted to say that you were sorry for your actions.

Please join in giving your location at the time of your memory and  your generation. An explanation of the generations and the purpose of the prompts along with conditions for joining in can be seen at the Times Past Page. Join in either in the comments or by creating your own post and linking. Looking forward to your memories.

Baby Boomer – Australia  country town

I have no doubt that I said the words many times before this event but this stands out in my memory as the first time I can remember these emotions coming from within myself, unbidden by parents or others.

I was around five years old and living in a small country town in NSW Australia. We lived about a half hour walk from school and having graduated from kindergarten to first class I was now allowed to walk home alone. I think my brother was supposed to walk with me but he wasn’t telling and nor was I.

The walk was three long streets in length and in the second street was Tattersall’s pub and a green grocer. This shop always tempted me with its hessian sacks of produce almost as tall as me on the street side of its entrance. The fruit held no appeal to me at all but the beans and peas were a constant temptation. One day it became too much for me and my little hand reached in and took a handful of plump, juicy beans.

“Oi,” was all I heard before I took off running. I altered my route and ran through a vacant block of ground dropping the beans as I ran. My pace didn’t slow until I was within sight of home where I slowed but my heart continued to pound with fear, guilt and remorse for what I had done.

Later that night a policeman knocked on the door. I hid under the bed with visions of being thrown in jail for my actions. I later discovered that the policeman was in Rotary with my Father and had some business to discuss with him.

The guilt I felt over the bean theft still remains with me. It was a good lesson learnt. I was never tempted to shoplift as many girls did in their teenage years and have never stolen  – all because at five I felt guilty and sorry.

Baby Boomer UK Rural

Heavy Hands #sorrynotsorry

I’m looking forward to reading  your memories…….

About Irene Waters 19 Writer Memoirist

I began my working career as a reluctant potato peeler whilst waiting to commence my training as a student nurse. On completion I worked mainly in intensive care/coronary care; finishing my hospital career as clinical nurse educator in intensive care. A life changing period as a resort owner/manager on the island of Tanna in Vanuatu was followed by recovery time as a farmer at Bucca Wauka. Having discovered I was no farmer and vowing never again to own an animal bigger than myself I took on the Barrington General Store. Here we also ran a five star restaurant. Working the shop of a day 7am - 6pm followed by the restaurant until late was surprisingly more stressful than Tanna. On the sale we decided to retire and renovate our house with the help of a builder friend. Now believing we knew everything about building we set to constructing our own house. Just finished a coal mine decided to set up in our backyard. Definitely time to retire we moved to Queensland. I had been writing a manuscript for some time. In the desire to complete this I enrolled in a post grad certificate in creative Industries which I completed 2013. I followed this by doing a Master of Arts by research graduating in 2017. Now I live to write and write to live.
This entry was posted in Memoir, Past Challenge, Times Past, Writing Challenges and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

26 Responses to I’m Sorry!: Times Past Challenge

  1. Charli Mills says:

    Oh, this is going to be an interesting topic, Irene. Your bean story had my heart pounding, too. I wonder why some children are more sensitive to guilt and remorse than others. Having that police officer stop by must have done you in at that moment! Glad to see Times Past (and you!) back in action!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Yes, Irene, I was wondering what happened to you. Glad to hear from you. Hummm, first time feeling sorry… I’ll think about that in the morning. Good night!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. A most interesting memory, Irene

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Wow, you really spilled the beans. (I wondered did the cop trail you home) I mayn’t make it back for a bit for this. I won’t feel guilty if I can’t. But that’s another story.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. ksbeth says:

    good to see you again and no need to apologize at all. life has many ups and downs and we need to do as we need to do. i was constantly sending in for things to receive in the mail as a young child and never had money to pay for them. like you, i always had a fear of the police coming to take me away.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. What a wonderful story, Irene, though it wasn’t a wonderful moment for you, running home in guilt and remorse. It’s guided you for the rest of your life – eating those beans wasn’t as important as knowing you’d done something wrong and hating that gut wrenching feeling.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. No apology or explanation ever necessary. Ahh good ole Guilt, the gift that keeps on giving.
    Interesting topic you have chosen to write about. All my best to you.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Annecdotist says:

    Oh, Irene, that’s a heavy burden of guilt for a five-year-old – makes me want to give you a cuddle! In the Catholic Church, babies are born with “the stain of original sin” so I guess I was guilty right from the start. But I don’t think my culture was very helpful in teaching me guilt as I now understand it in a genuine concern at potentially having harmed others and a wish to make amends. I’ll call back later in the month if I have anything else to say!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for adding your thoughts Anne and the cuddle was gratefully received. My father was a Presbyterian minister so I was taught right from wrong very early in the piece and I was taught what I could say and what I couldn’t because there was a definite code of behaviour that was expected of the minister’s family in a small country town.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Pingback: Heavy Hands #sorrynotsorry | TanGental

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